Summer is about to end. Schedules are filling up. Did you over-commit yourself? Did you sign up for a class you don’t like? Join a committee that is cutting into family time? Say yes to a second date you aren’t sure about? You have the right to change your mind. You don’t even have to explain yourself. But if you feel like you do, here are some tips:
1. Resist the urge to belittle yourself by saying something like, “I’m sorry but I’m just not good at _____ (fill in the blank).”
2. Instead, with respect and firm resolve say something like, “I’ve realized I won’t have the time to continue with_____ (fill in the blank).”
3. If you are getting a negative response, a guilt trip, or peer pressure, take a mindful breath or two, and repeat your response with kind resolve.
If backing out completely is not an option, is there a way you can cut back on your commitment and still feel good about staying involved?
Make sure you are not backing out of something you really want to do because you are afraid you might fail. If this is the case, talk to someone who has experience in your new endeavor to get some ideas of how to calm your nerves. It’s normal and human to be nervous when you try something new.
Changing your mind takes a certain amount of assertiveness. True assertiveness is a stress management skill that shows respect for you as well as others involved in the situation.
Do you have a good story about how your mindfulness practice helped you make a difficult decision? Please share.
Still having trouble changing your mind? Contact us.